Hi Neely,
I’ll get right to the point. I’m 5’7″ and 27 years old. I’d say I’m better than average looking and fairly fit, but I find I have a hard time meeting women because they want taller men. Obviously I’m not getting any taller – unless they invent some sort of growth pills – but I do want to meet someone who doesn’t care about my height and loves me for me. I find being a short guy is tough – if I have confidence then people say I have a Napoleon complex; if I don’t have confidence then I’m, well, a short guy with no confidence. How do you suggest I attract women despite my 5’7″ stature?
Short guy, Boston
Submit your dating/relationship questions to [email protected]. And don’t forget to check out my website: neelysteinberg.com.
Now tune in to the male perspective – this week featuring James Michael Sama; www.limitlesslifestyle.com.
I love short men!!! And there are a lot of women that don’t discriminate when it comes to personal appearance, including height. And I agree Neely, passion for your life, having something that is interesting about you far out weighs height or any other physical characteristics.
It’s true. The ones worth being with won’t sign off because of your height. And I agree with both you and Angie! Passion for life.. Hm, dare I say.. pantie dropper? Love. Great topic, great advice.
My ex was short – 5’6″ and I am 5’7″. It was a problem for him because he made it so. If you want to attract a woman than my suggestion is to make your height a non-issue. Don’t even bring it up. If it does come up make a joke about it – let your date know that YOU don’t have a problem with your height and she won’t have a problem with it either! Just be you – quit pointing out the fact that you are short. Make being with you such a fun and pleasurable experience she doesn’t even notice or care about the height difference – it’s a non-issue. Do you really believe that if you met all of a woman’s core needs and values she would kick you to the curb because of your stature? She wouldn’t!
I mentioned this exact thing in my video above 🙂
Great topic. Great advice. I’ve known men in both ranges, and both had issues. One guy I was with was just an inch taller than me. He was okay with his height and joked about it. The other was 6’5″ and had issues because he was so tall. I think Sassy above said it well – if you don’t make it an issue, you’ll see a change. Women worth their salt won’t dismiss because of your height or lack thereof. Good advice from both perspectives! Thanks James!
My ex husband was short, but he was funny and people loved him. He made light of his height and it only added to his appeal. He is still a good friend, because he truly is and was an enjoyable person much of the time to be around. I agree with both James and Neely – someone worthwhile won’t automatically judge you based on height. I think most of the time, we humans deliver a judgement to others on a silver platter, when we should just keep our mouths shut and our attitudes elevated and positive… Let people draw their own conclusions about you before they hear what you have to say about yourself… 🙂
I really don’t know how to respond to this..I’m not short (6’4), not am I into men… From the shorter guys that I know that do get a lot of dates the one they most of them have in commons is confidence. Confidence goes a very long way, just make sure it doesn’t turn into arrogance, cause then you’re in trouble.
Neely, you nailed it! It’s all about confidence. One of my best friends is 5’7″, and that man never had a problem finding beautiful women to date. A little swag goes a loooong way. Mr. Short Guy is stuck in a self fulfilling prophecy; a never ending loop of self doubt. I wish him all the best and hope that he finds his source of confidence.
I prefer a shorter guy over a taller guy! And I think confidence is the Best. A mentally healthy woman will see past the external and will be able to appreciate what’s inside.
well said Neely! .i also would never, ever right off a guy who was on the shorter end (and 5’7″ is not that short btw) if he was smart, charming, passionate, polite, funny, engaging, easy going, adventurous, etc etc etc…or any combination of the above!
The list of things people actually look for in a partner goes on and on and on. I judge people way more on qualities they have actual CONTROL over. It says so much more about them than their height. Plus, I’m a sucker for nice eyes and if you’re 5’7″ it might just be that much easier for me to stare into them!
Any one have any advice on how you acquire confidence?
Hi Satirev,
Thanks for posting your question! I have some thoughts for you and will do a special MP4Love on it in the coming weeks. Stay tuned!
Best,
Neely