How very unrefreshing — a story about Americas favorite frenemies and America’s least favorite married couple.

The New York Daily News reports that Lauren Conrad, in the August issue of Harper’s Bazaar, goes to town on Heidi and Spencer Pratt and their attention-seeking ways.

“I don’t call magazines and let them know about things so they can write stories,” she says of the camera-loving couple. “There was never an incentive to keep doing ‘The Hills’ so I could get into [Hollywood club] Les Deux. That was never the point. It was more to create a fan base so I can go create a business and do something I really love doing.”

She also brings up Heidi’s fake breasts, which will be seen in the September issue of Playboy. “They’re not going to pay for themselves,” she said.