10 – “Breaking Dawn” page 278

I groaned and opened my eyes. The skies were dull gray — it was daytime, but no clue as to when. Maybe close to sunset — it was pretty dark.

“About time,” Blondie mumbled from not too far away. “The chainsaw impersonation was getting a little tired.”

9 – “Breaking Dawn” page 186

“We’re going to let Jacob and Bella speak privately,” Edward said. [...]

“Over my pile of ashes,” Rosalie hissed at him.

8 – “Breaking Dawn” page 178

“So take the blonde out first. Your kind can be put back together, right? Turn her into jigsaw and take care of Bella.”

7 – “Breaking Dawn” page 247

“You’re scared of Leah, but you’re best buds with the psychopathic blonde?”

There was a low hiss from the second floor. Cool, she’d heard me.

6 – “Breaking Dawn” page 295

“Hey, do you know what you call a blonde with a brain?” I asked, and then continued on the same breath, “a golden retriever.”

“I’ve heard that one, too,” she said, no longer smiling.

“I’ll keep trying,” I promised [...].

5 – “Breaking Dawn” page 294

“Enjoy, mongrel.”

It had once probably been a big mixing bowl, but she’d bent the bowl back in on itself until it was shaped almost exactly like a dog dish. I had to be impressed with her quick craftsmanship. And her attention to detail. She’d scratched the word Fido into the side. Excellent handwriting.

4 – “Breaking Dawn” page 294

“Rosalie, why don’t you get Jacob something from the kitchen?” Alice said. [...]

Rosalie stared at the place Alice’s voice had come from in disbelief.

“Thanks, anyways, Alice, but I don’t think I’d want to eat something Blondie’s spit in. I’d bet my system wouldn’t take too kindly to venom.”

“Rosalie would never embarrass Esme by displaying such a lack of hospitality.”

“Of course not,” Blondie said in a sugar-sweet voice that I immediately distrusted. She got up and breezed out of the room.

Edward sighed.

“You’d tell me if she poisoned it, right?” I asked.

3 – “Breaking Dawn” page 271

“You know how to drown a blonde, Rosalie?” I asked without stopping or turning to look at her. “Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool.” [...]

“I’ve already heard that one,” Rosalie called after me.

2 – “Breaking Dawn” page 324

“Have you heard this one, Psycho? How do a blonde’s brain cells die?”

She didn’t say anything.

“Well?” I asked. “Do you know the punch line or not?”

She looked pointedly at the TV and ignored me.

“Has she heard it?” I asked Edward.

There was no humor in his tense face — he didn’t move his eyes from Bella. But he said, “No.”

“Awesome. So you’ll enjoy this, bloodsucker — a blonde’s brain cells die alone.”

Rosalie still didn’t look at me. “I have killed a hundred times more often than you have, you disgusting beast. Remember that.”

1 – “Breaking Dawn” page 304

Silently, I lifted my doggy bowl off the floor. Then, with a quick, powerful flip of my wrist, I threw it into the back of Blondie’s head so hard that — with an earsplitting bang – it smashed flat before it ricocheted across the room and snapped the round top piece off the thick newel post at the foot of the stairs. [...]

“Dumb blonde,” I muttered.

Rosalie turned her head slowly, and her eyes were blazing.

“You. Got. Food. In. My. Hair.”

Blast does not own “Breaking Dawn” or any other of Stephenie Meyer’s works.