I’m not sure how to approach this review. I don’t want to be needlessly harsh, but I’m not sure the producers of this film approached it the right way.

At the end credits of “Goon,” we learn that the movie is based on the exploits of a real life hockey goon and are treated to some clips of his actual fights, as well as an interview with the original goon. A documentary would have been far more interesting than the mess that was this fictional narrative.

Instead of a doc, we get the story of Doug Glatt (who is apparently Jewish, though we never learn why we should need to know this), a guy who can take a punch. He can’t play hockey, but someone gets the bright idea to put a uniform and skates on him and get him on the ice as a ‘goon.’ For the uninitiated, a hockey goon is someone who lacks great skill with the puck but is an enforcer on the ice, ready to throw down the gloves and duke it out with anyone trying to intimidate his teammates. Doug is shipped to a team to help a once-budding star gain back his confidence, which he lost after a vicious hit from another goon. Doug, played by Seann William Scott, is set on a collision course with the other goon, Liev Schreiber of all people, who is a tough guy at the end of his career.

I had to ask a random moviegoer at the end of this film if I had missed something. This movie has more personalities than Sybill. I almost think the production ran out of money or started with one production team and then found another halfway into shooting. It’s part “Slapshot,” “Bad News Bears,” “American Pie,” and even “Full Metal Jacket” (the team’s hockey coach spews more expletives than Sgt. Hartman).

The character of Doug Glatt is portrayed as a simpleton and borderline moron (in the strictest IQ sense), and I think one reason Seann William Scott may have taken this role is because he’s sick of being known as Stifler and the guy from “Dude Where’s My Car?” But there’s playing against type and running so far from type as to make you look ridiculous. Unfortunately, it’s the latter that occurs in “Goon.” And to make things worse, someone decided to cast Eugene Levy as Doug Glatt’s father, who is disappointed with his son’s life choices. Levy plays the role straight up, but the implication of putting him in this movie is clear: it’s an American Pie cast reunion, in case you just couldn’t wait for the actual reunion in, wait for it, American Reunion. I half expected to see Jason Biggs show up or the hockey team hooking up with girls from band camp.

There are a few laughs in Goon, but every time it presents itself as comedic it then swerves into the dramatic or the romantically comic or styles itself as a typical zeroes to heroes sports film. And then there’s the violence. All the beat downs in Happy Gilmore were funny (marginally funny) because it was not to be taken too seriously, but in “Goon” the right hooks are at once non-believable and over the top ugly. I’m surprised they even made this film, considering the fact that the NHL has gone to great lengths to take fighting out of the game. But when the gloves do come off the fights are so unreal as to be laughable. Except at some point, the fights go from being Happy Gilmore-style to more severe and graphic than any the Rocky films could conjure.

There may have been a kernel of a good idea for this film once, but it ends up in such bad and bloody shape that no good cast can rescue it. A documentary would have been so much more interesting. In the modern game of hockey, where there are no goons anymore, it would have been compelling to get a look back at how the game used to be and what the function of a “goon” truly was—how they were used, gladiator-style, to thrill fans who went to a boxing match only to find a hockey game break out. As is, however, “Goon” really deserves to be placed in the penalty box.

If you’re a parent, you could easily find yourself watching "The Sorcerer’s Apprentice". The kiddos have reached the mid-Summer ennui, stuck between enthusiasm for being out of school and the nervous anticipation for the next year. More than that, it’s hot, and the air conditioner is on the fritz. You’ve taken them to the pool, the water park, the mall, the sprinklers in the backyard. They’re bored, you’re tired, and- hey look, a Disney movie! That’ll keep them entertained for two hours or so!

The kids might be happy for that two hours. Heck, they may even enjoy this loosest of adaptations of "The Sorcerer’s Apprentice" from "Fantasia". But if, out of hope or simple desperation you decide to shell out $10 for each of your kids as well as yourself, keep this in mind: I didn’t think "Apprentice" was absolutely heinous. But about five minutes after I left the theater I promptly forgot about it. The only reason I remembered was I saw the listing in my planner saying this review was due.

One of the main problems is there’s just too much dry plot. "The Sorcerer’s Apprentice" stars Nicolas Cage as an ageless wizard from the time of Merlin and Jay Baruchel, the physics major from NYU who becomes his protege. There are evil wizards, which Cage’s character has been battling for the past thousand years or so, including Morgana La Fay from Arthurian legend and her biggest follower (played by Alfred Molina, who seems to be having just a whee of a time). There’s all sorts of discussions of the Prime Merlinian, and Cage’s love interest (Monica Bellucci) who’s locked in Morgana’s body, who’s been locked in a doll, and if she gets out of the doll she’s going to raise an army of dead wizards…and round and round she goes.

There are a few charms in the movie, including images of Cage riding metal eagles from the Chrysler building and Bellucci swaying and cavorting atop a fountain in Battery Park, electricity flowing from her maestro fingers.There’s a terrific riff on "illusionists" like Criss Angel (an Angel lookalike is played by Toby Kebbell). The writers (yes, all five of them) introduce some intriguing ideas about the intersection between magic and science, and reference the patron saint of mad scientists Nicola Tesla, but these themes were explored more beautifully and completely in "The Prestige" a few years back.

Baruchel plays David, the titular apprentice, like a nerdier Woody Allen, but in this he’s got none of Allen’s dubious charm. Listening to Baruchel affect a slightly autistic stutter is irritating at best and kind of offensive at worst. But it’s preferable to watching Cage trudge like a reanimated corpse through this movie, delivering his lines like a petulant child who’s been asked to behave at a dinner party. Only Molina seems up to the task of bringing life and vigor into his role as the evil Horvath (and how great a name is Horvath for a villain?) He seems to relish the bowler hat and cane he carries, drawling his lines in that divine voice of his.

Looking now at the cast list, this film should be far more memorable than it is. I of course blame director Jon Turteltaub, the man who is second only to Brett Ratner in hackery. The thing about Turteltaub is that his movies are never spectacularly horrible; they don’t explode but rather implode with a whimper, bogged down with the weight of their own inconsequence. The children at the screening I was at laughed at some of the jokes,and definitely seemed to like the steel eagle scenes. But when the lights go up and you face the long ride home to your busted air conditioner, will it stay with them? Will they want to play games where they too can harness the power emitting from a Tesla coil? I don’t think so.

Besides, wouldn’t you like to just take them back to the pool instead?

"She’s Out of My League" never gets around to answering its central question, "Why would a 10 date a 5?" Instead the film seems more interested in lame gross-out gags and tired scenes of guys sitting around talking and trying to sound like they are in a Judd Apatow movie.

It’s a shame, because there is a solid comedic set-up here that is wasted in the unoriginal execution.

Kirk (Jay Baruchel) is a nerdy TSA airport security guard who meets blond bombshell Molly (Alice Eve) in a perfectly cute fashion. She forgets her iPhone after rushing through security to catch her flight and Kirk returns it to her. As a thank you, Molly offers to take Kirk to a hockey game and the two begin an awkward courtship.

The film spends little time explaining why Molly falls so hard for Kirk. Sure, he seems like a nice guy, but there seems to be very little else to recommend him. He has a crappy job, a terrible family and a truly loathsome ex-girlfriend. Molly’s best friend (played by a scene-stealing Krysten Ritter) suggests that she sees Kirk as a safe alternative after being hurt by a more handsome ex. But that is hardly a reason for Molly to go for a dip in the shallow end of the gene pool.

Instead of scenes showing Molly and Kirk developing a relationship beyond the music-montage standard of your run of the mill crappy romantic comedy, we get a scene of Kirk getting help from a friend with his manscaping. Then one of Molly’s dog amorously licking Kirks crotch after he has an "accident" during a particularly heavy make-out session with Molly.

Perhaps a more charismatic actor could have made it work. Unfortunately Jay Baruchel proves to be a bit of a dud in his leading man debut. His twitchy body movements and understated line delivery recall a young Nicolas Cage but unfortunately he doesn’t have the kooky charm to match. He just seems completely uncomfortable in his own skin and it makes him an unappealing hero to root for.

It’s a shame that Baruchel isn’t better, because Alice Eve is quite good. She takes a thankless "dream girl" part and invests Molly with genuine charm, intelligence and sweetness. I never bought that her character would stick with the befuddled Kirk.

"She’s Out of My League" squanders the promise it shows early, chasing the easy joke instead of focusing on the characters. Instead it becomes and awkward mash-up of the Farrelly Brother’s “anything goes” vulgarity and a Judd Apatow bro-centric relationship comedy.

Skip this one. Instead stay home and wonder if there is anyone outside characters from crappy movies who actually ranks girl’s hotness numerically. Seems to me like an incredibly limiting and subjective evaluation method.

Alice Eve is a solid 10 — at least, according to the new comedy "She’s Out of My League."

Eve plays Molly, a blonde-haired, green-eyed knockout who inexplicably falls for quirky, nerdy guy Kirk Kettner (Jay Baruchel). Despite her best friend Patty’s (Krysten Ritter) doubts, Eve starts to date Kirk and they both find out what happens when a "hard 10" dates a 5.

Beyond introducing the British-born Eve to America, the film marks Jay Baruchel’s first shot as a leading man. Baruchel is a member of Judd Apatow’s never-ending stash of comedic talent that has produced stars like Seth Rogen and Jason Segal.

Blast got a chance to hang out with Alice Eve and co-star Krysten Ritter at Kings Bowling Alley in the Back Bay and talked with the two young stars about playing a a “dream girl,” having potty mouths and the best date advice they ever got.

Video Credit: Brooklynne Kelly Peters

I am a huge Seth Rogen fan. And I love Jay Baruchel in just about everything he’s been in. So I am baffled by how I missed “Jay and Seth Vs. The Apocalypse,” a “trailer” for a film Rogen and Baruchel want to make that has been on YouTube for over two years.

Turns out the dynamic duo and “Superbad” co-mastermind Evan Goldberg came up with that short to promote interest for a feature film — a promotion that ended up paying off last January when Mandate Pictures secured the rights to make the movie. Making buzz about a film that hasn’t been made to get it rolling towards production is a tactic that is being used often nowadays it seems, as it is the same thing Jason Bateman did while on tour for “Juno” to get the “Arrested Development” movie to begin development.

The MTV Movies Blog talked to Baruchel about what was taking the film so long to reach the big screen: turns out “The Green Hornet” and a possible hockey movie called “Goon” are standing in the way of production.

“They’re working on the ['Jay and Seth'] script right now” Baruchel told MTV. “All the concepts are there, all the beats are there, the treatment is there and a movie with us in it”"we’ll improvise half the thing anyway, so it doesn’t matter.”

He said the film will at least happen in the next year and a half “for sure.”

How awesome is it that Rogen, Baruchel and Goldberg got a film to be made based on buzz alone? Did you miss this YouTube hit just like we did? Let us know below!

Michael Cera is at that point in his career where everything he touches turns to gold.

That’s the main reason why “Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist,” the film adaptation of the popular young adult novel, which settles at being a mediocre rom-com, will make money from the teenage demographic.

Michael Cera plays Nick, the only straight member of Queercore band The Jerk-Offs (tentatively titled). He is busy writhing in heartache after his too-hot-for-him girlfriend Tris (Alexis Dziena) tragically breaks his heart.

Norah, played by “The House Bunny” star Kat Dennings, is a friend but not a fan of Tris, but is the lucky recipient of Nick’s mopey mixed tapes after Tris throws them away. In fact, not only does she enjoy the music on the tapes, but she is halfway in love with Nick before she even meets him.

Therefore, by lucky coincidence, Norah picks Nick to masquerade as her “boyfriend” for the night to get back at Tris for implying that she had no chance to land a guy. Of course, Norah has no idea that this cute guy she has been eying all night and subsequently makes out with is Tris’s ex, but soon finds out when Tris, new boy in tow, jealously walks up and demands how the two know each other.

Ah, a night to never forget.

The whole story is supposed to take place over the course of one night, starting during the school day and ending at somewhere between six and eight a.m. the next day. Nick and Norah bond over a love for the band “Where’s Fluffy?” and spend a good portion of the night trying to find the band as well as her very drunk best friend (Ari Graynor).

The music in the movie which includes tracks from up-and-coming indie artists like Vampire Weekend and We Are Scientists, plays such an important role that it almost becomes ia character unto itself, perfectly matching the feel of the film.

“Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist” is cute, no doubt. Cera and Dennings have an awkwardly comfortable and honest chemistry that reflects how normal teenagers would respond to the film’s outrageous situations.Their characters don’t fall in love at first sight. Nick is still getting over Tris, and Norah is dealing with an ex-with-benefits (Jay Baruchel) that she can’t quite get rid of. In fact, the two of them don’t get along most of the night; Norah is angry and jealous that Nick can’t seem to direct his focus away from Tris when it so clear that it is Norah that he should be with, and Nick is annoyed that Norah keeps making irritated comments about how bad Tris was for him.

Comedic relief comes in the form of Nick’s gay bandmates (who know a lot more about how to handle a heterosexual relationship than either Nick or Nora) and Norah’s quickly and extremely intoxicated best friend Caroline (Graynor) who they chase around New York City for the large portion of the film.

Cera is not as funny here as he was in previous ones like “Superbad” and “Juno,” which is a bit disappointing. He still manages to channel the awkward, nerd charm that has put him at the tops of teen heartthrob lists nationwide, but his performance felt a bit lacking.

Similarly, Jay Baruchel let his brief role fall flat as he was only a huge jerk. Baruchel, who did great in the recent comedy hit “Tropic Thunder,” could have created more of an interesting and funny character instead of cashing in on the stereotypical romantic comedy “bad guy.”

“Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist” is nowhere near being this year’s “Juno,” but it offers a cute and healthy alternative to a generation that thrives off the delicious smut of “Gossip Girl” and the teenage pop that is Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers.

The biggest problem with “Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist” is that it stays well within the bounds of a normal teen rom-com. It doesn’t go above and beyond, nor does it fail in creating a cutesy teen movie. The movie has the potential to be really great, even original, but settled with just being all right.

Ben Stiller might not act in the greatest movies, but he sure knows how to write and direct them. With ‘Tropic Thunder’, Stiller creates an explosive new comedy that’s sure to blow anyone’s socks off.

‘Thunder’ starts off right from what its trailer sets up: director Damien Cockburn (Steve Coogan) wants to create the greatest war movie of all time, but his lead actors in his film-based-on-a-book-based-on-a-true-story (but is it?) don’t have the emotional scope needed to understand the complexities behind the Vietnam War.

After some difficult struggles with his prima donna actors: Kirk Lazarus (Robert Downey Jr.), Jeff Portnoy (Jack Black) and Tugg Speedman (Ben Stiller), Cockburn is convinced by the author of the book Four Leaf Tayback (Nick Nolte) to drop the actors in the middle of Vietnam and shoot the movie ‘guerilla-style’. Both the film and the book in the movie are named ‘Tropic Thunder’, which is where the title of the actual film comes from.

It takes about 20 minutes for Lazarus, Portnoy, Speedman, Alpa Chino (Brandon T. Jackson) and Kevin Sandusky (Jay Baruchel) to be stranded in the middle of nowhere in Vietnam, thinking that they are filming a movie that had suddenly become very real. The movie just becomes funnier as it goes along, with the actors never being quite sure whether or not they are actually in a movie or not.

Also, as a slightly-spoilerish warning, the ad you will see for “Booty Sweat” is not the cinema going insane, but rather marks the completely inventive and perfectly hysterical introduction to “Tropic Thunder”. You have been warned.

While not as outlandish as ‘Zoolander’ was, ‘Tropic Thunder’ is set outside our reality in a way that everyone can understand. Ben Stiller has said in previous interviews that he wrote ‘Thunder’ as a parody of the movie business and, even if no one in the audience understood it, it would still be hysterical to him. Well Ben, we get it, and it’s still pretty funny.

Unexpected were the many cameos, both big and small, made by some of Hollywood’s biggest actors. Matthew McConaughey has a surprisingly big role as Speedman’s agent, and Tom Cruise definitely deserves all the buzz he’s been getting as the big-time film executive behind ‘Tropic Thunder’. Danny McBride was hysterical as the pyromaniac effects guy Cody. Also keep an eye out for Bill Hader, Tyra Banks, Maria Menunos, Jason Bateman, Lance Bass, Alicia Silverstone, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jon Voight, Christine Taylor and an I-can’t-believe-he-did-that Tobey Maguire (don’t be late or you’ll miss that one). Oh yeah, Stiller got them all.

Sure it may not be the most outright intelligent film to make a mockery of Hollywood, but there is plenty of insider humor that can be relished by all. The scene where Lazarus explains to Speedman why he didn’t get an Oscar for his role as the mentally retarded boy Jack in his film ‘Simple Jack’ because he went “full retard” was one of the funniest scenes in the film.

Downey was hysterical as Lazarus who becomes so immersed in his role that he changed his skin color in order to become more in character. Black was very two dimensional and not funny as Portnoy, the heroine-addicted fat guy. And Stiller was, well, Stiller.

The most break-out role in the film was hands-down Jay Baruchel, who many will recognize from “Knocked Up” and “Million Dollar Baby” but who has not landed a leading role since Judd Aptow’s lesser known but just as short-lived TV series, “Undeclared”. Baruchel’s character Kevin Sandusky is very similar to Baruchel in real life: he is an actor who has gotten his first big role and is playing everything by the book, like going to the boot camp training that had been assigned and learning how to read a map, while his fellow actors just brushed everything off. As the only one with a lick of common sense, Baruchel has some definite potential and it seems like we can expect big things from him in the future.

‘Tropic Thunder’ so far has been the best comedy of 2008, and it very much deserves that title. While the movie will keep audiences laughing well into the credits, it brings about two important questions: Why hasn’t Ben Stiller written and directed more movies, and will this be Tom Cruise’s big comeback (in more than one way)?

The not-so-viral stunt that made going to see “Tropic Thunder” a must. This clip is property of MTV Networks, no copyright infringement intended.

Oh yeah, Carl makes a cameo too. See if you can spot him!