About Emma Rose Johnson


Emma Johnson is a Blast Magazine critic whose work has appeared in The Boston Globe

Posts by Emma Rose Johnson:

Robocop movie review

Robocop movie review 1

The original “RoboCop,” the 1987 film by Paul Verhoeven, was a vicious, unrepentant foray into deep cultural fears about corporate domination, media corruption and the urban crime epidemic. Now in the 21st century we are neck-deep in the realizations of those fears: the movie’s native environment of Detroit has gone from a city in crisis(…)

Review: That Awkward Moment

Review: That Awkward Moment 0

Freshman screenwriter and director Tom Gormican gets a lot of credit for getting financing for this movie. Not only is it a rom-com where the main characters are guys instead of clumsy, too-busy-for-men ladies, it’s also an original script that was somehow not adapted from a chick-lit novel or a self-help book. The mind reels.(…)

Review: “Ride Along” is shockingly not terrible

Review: “Ride Along” is shockingly not terrible 0

The first 40 minutes of “Ride Along” are awkward, poorly edited and acted, and not nearly as funny as it thinks it is. None of this seems surprising- as stated before, January is Trash Duty. A cop comedy with Ice Cube and the infinitely marketable Kevin Hart (who appears to be in literally every comedy(…)

The Legend of Hercules movie review

The Legend of Hercules movie review 0

Well it’s January, boys and girls, and that means it’s Trash Time! For those not fortunate enough to know, the first two or three months of every year are dedicated to studios clearing their shelves of all their embarrassing-yet-profitable dreck for a tidy first quarter revenue stream. It’s beautiful, really- like watching black-hearted capitalism and(…)

The 10 worst movies of 2013

The 10 worst movies of 2013 2

There’s nothing like getting assigned a “Top Ten Movies” reflection story to make you realize just how much garbage you’ve consumed in the past year. I’ve just looked at my reviews from 2013, so please allow me a quick sidebar with my intrepid editor, John Guilfoil: John, dude- are you mad at me about something?(…)

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug review

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug review 0

It’s a well-worn joke that Peter Jackson doesn’t know how to make a short movie. All of his major films have clocked in at 2.5 hours or longer (that’s before the special release director’s cut, and the DVD extras). He’s also a founding member of the Christopher Nolan All-Stars, a.k.a. Directors who Have Too Much(…)

Thor: The Dark World review

Thor: The Dark World review 0

Chris Hemsworth’s character might be the title of this sequel, and an Avenger to boot, but dammit, Thor: The Dark World is Tom Hiddleston’s movie. Directed by: Alan Taylor Written by: Christopher Yost, Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, Tom Hiddleston How do I accurately convey how good Hiddleston is in this(…)

The Fifth Estate review

The Fifth Estate review 0

It’s a common maxim that history is written by the winners. But what about the history when there are no clear winners? When something momentous happens- and then nothing really changes at all? And what if we are being asked to write the history we are still living? Directed by: Bill Condon Written by: Josh(…)

“Machete Kills” movie review

“Machete Kills” movie review 0

I only just saw “Machete” a few weeks ago- I caught a poorly edited version of it on TNT or FX or something- so I have only been recently entranced by the Robert Rodriguez 70s action schlockfest/softcore porn/loving homage to Mexican-American culture. But entranced I am! Because, come on, it’s a 70s action schlockfest/softcore porn/loving(…)

“Gravity” movie review

“Gravity” movie review 0

In every movie nerd’s subconscious, there is a file marked “Do Not Destroy.” In that file are all the cinematic images that have refused to be washed away by the tides of lifelong media saturation. Among other things, my file has: the final scene of the original “Wicker Man;” the moment in “Fargo” when Frances(…)

Movie Review: “Rush”

Movie Review: “Rush” 0

It’s not difficult to explain what “Rush,” the Ron Howard historical film about the contentious rivalry of two Formula One drivers in the 1970s was trying to tell me. It’s a movie about speed, both the mechanical kind and the pure kinetic energy of human beings. It’s about Europe in the 1970s, with the magnificent(…)

Movie Review: “Baggage Claim”

Movie Review: “Baggage Claim” 0

About halfway through “Baggage Claim,” a feather-light rom-com, the requisite slutty and funny BFF (the fantastic Jill Scott) asks our heroine Montana (Paula Patton) why she’s so hell-bent on getting married. After all, this is 2013, and who needs a man anymore? Our oddly-named Montana responds with the usual speech: she wants someone to love(…)

Review: “Prisoners” kinda sucks

Review: “Prisoners” kinda sucks 3

On the way home from this movie, I thought about what I could have done during the two-a-half hours that would have been more productive, enlightening, or entertaining than sitting and watching this pretentious, unpleasant little piece of torture porn. Here’s the top ten, in no particular order. I could have done two loads of(…)