Women don’t care what you think about what we wear

I did it. I found the worst listicle on the Internet. Behold: 10 things women wear that men hate.

It seems the brilliant men behind Complex Magazine, “The Ultimate Mens (sic) Buyers (sic) Guide,” have decided that what the world really needs is yet more documented evidence that men think they should be in charge of women’s bodies.

Here’s a choice quote from the listicle, on shearling boots (like Uggs): “Women choose comfort over style at the airport, the grocery store, or Starbucks, but what they don’t know is that these spots are exactly the places where one might meet a potential mate.”

Women choosing comfort over style?! Perish the thought!

It’s a tale as old as time, reinforced by style magazines and advertisements and the myth that women need to look a certain way so we can “get a man.” Remember that scene from the very first episode of Mad Men where Pete critiques Peggy’s outfit in front of her boss? Yeah, it seems a lot of men think that sort of behavior should still be socially acceptable.

Amidst all this confusion, I’m going to set the record straight. So just open your mind like a flower in the morning and it will all be alright. Ready? Here goes:

Women do not care what you think about our clothes.

We do not care if you hate our high-waisted jeans and flip-flops. We do not care if large sunglasses obscuring a woman’s face send you into paroxysms of confusion over her potential as an object of desire. We do not care if you think ankle-length dresses are somehow ruining your summer.

If you are so preoccupied with another person’s clothing that you dedicate time and thought to categorizing everything you hate about it, then you’ve got bigger problems than how to hold up a tube top while sweating in 100 degree weather.

Here’s what women do care about: staying comfortable while expressing ourselves through visual representation. That’s a fancy way of saying that we dress for us, not for you.